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Only the Very Greatest Hits

by Jonathan Hamlow

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1.
Dr. Everyday 01:53
Welcome one and all to the Chaosium Rollercoaster Keep to the right, please Trust me, everyone will get a chance Ooh, the blood-red flowers of regret You haven’t seen the worst of it yet You on the left, if you’d pass the buck You on the right, if you’d pass the hat There, that works out nicely I guess you’d call that entropy I went to see Dr. Everyday I said Doc, I think I need an X-ray He said, that won’t be necessary Held up a mirror said son, what do you see Well, Doc, I been down so long It looks like up to me
2.
You are in a decompression chamber Some disorientation is completely normal Please try not to be alarmed You are completely safe You are beyond danger now You ascended too quickly The paralysis and pain you are experiencing is a result of a formation of gas bubbles in the bloodstream This condition is known as Caisson disease or more commonly the bends It is not uncommon Although your case was particularly severe We will gradually reduce the pressure until you acclimate to standard conditions
3.
Penny for thoughts and a pound for your foolishness Pennies from heaven and pennies from elsewhere Anything, something for nothing I’m drowning How can I call you, I don’t have your number She said do you believe in heaven? I said I believe in a place I don’t believe that she’s thinking about me I’m trying now to remember her face This is the easy part, nothing for something This is the part where I just slip away In my mind is your hand in my hand and I’m dreaming Of leaving, of going away She said do you believe in heaven? I said I believe in a place I don’t believe that she’s thinking about me I’m trying now to remember her face One for her mother who’s gone up to heaven Two for her father who’s changed Three for her sister who’s growing up nicely Four is for me, but she can’t think that way She said do you believe in salvation? I said I do, but it’s only a guess She said do you believe in heaven? Someone please tell her from me I said yes
4.
I’d like to tell you a true story, now never heard a true story I never say what I mean I never say all I mean But if you could read between my lines
5.
His head grew till it occupied the world He said, I’ve not begun to fight And I don’t intend to And his head grew till it occupied the world
6.
Samson 01:23
*this song contains uncouth and profane lyrics* Hey Samson, what you doing ‘round Growing out my hair I’m gonna pull the fucking temple down Hey Samson, what you doing ‘round Growing out my hair I’m gonna pull the fucking temple down Hey Samson, what you doing ‘round Pulling out my hair I’m gonna pull that fucking temple down Hey Samson, what you doing ‘round I’m growing out my hair I’m gonna pull the fucking temple down This world you made is not worth shit And I don’t care If I go down with it
7.
In the middle of nowhere In the middle of time Time is just another word for nowhere
8.
Video Mail! 00:32
Video mail, video mail why did you send me the video mail?
9.
Cool 01:54
You're so cool
10.
She's not thinking about you
11.
12.
And I love to listen to music with you And I love to walk by the lake with you I’d love to dance by candlelight with you And I love those moonlight strolls with you And I will always love you And you will always love me And we will always love each other And I love the fairy tales with you And I love romantic dinners with you And I love those shooting stars with you And I love traveling with you And I will always love you And you will always love me
13.
Better Way 01:27
So hey you think you’ve got me backed into a corner locked in tight you think you’ve got me all tied up you think you finally killed my fight Not in this life, not in this life Not while I’m still sucking air Not while I’m still standing Not while I still care You think it’s easy, simple answer is so obvious I will not accept your answers I will not accept you answer There's got to be a better way
14.
My fine mentor told me to start where I am, to write what I knew He showed me what to do David, I wrote this song for you Don’t you understand? Don’t you understand? I’m writing to forget the pain Of being who I am
15.
16.
The Center 04:50
I looked up and saw the lathe of heaven spinning in the sky I looked down and saw my feet three inches past the edge of night Far out past the furthest reach of distances the mind can hold No up no down no push no pull no weight no heat no cold And the Center will not hold tonight And I cannot be bold tonight The center will not hold out any longer And it's cold out but I'm stronger Than I've ever been before I looked back behind and saw that time is just a filing case I looked in the mirror and saw the same old unfamiliar face Resemblance is uncanny but I'm not a man who knows his place The center is unearthly and it vanishes without a trace And the lathe is spinning past control And I am just another troll Three billygoats won't pay the toll on this bridge Always searching past the next ridge Always something past the known It makes so little sense to ponder distances far past the point where distance loses meaning where extension's just another joint But if I cannot find the pivot where it all is hinged and hung And if the center will not hold how will I know my song is sung The Center cannot hold tonight And I cannot be bold tonight The center cannot hold against a tide of flux A thousand reaching minds in flux All shaping something stranger than before
17.
My heart’s will My heart’s whim Will o’ the wisp done led me astray again My blood’s ebb My blood’s flow Follow my light to an end that I may know I don’t judge I don’t fear Content to know that things are not what they appear Learned patience Learned pain I learned my lesson, that’s just the kind of man I am
18.
Gauss 01:20
The measurement of action at a distance extension, mass and time, the rhyme of resistance The unbearable burden of being of singing, writing, breathing, and seeing Give me an inch, an ounce, and a second A centimeter or a gram’ll do I reckon Give me a magnet, give me a gauss There’s a chemist rocking the acid house
19.
First Song 01:15
I’ll write you the first song might not be the worst song yet but you can bet I’ll write you a lesson make sure it can guess one story that you’ve never told Be you ever so bold as to write the first song strike the first stroke would you sing along join the cosmic joke Lay it down line by line It’s poetry, I say, I’m feeling fine
20.
Fear and necessity is all I need Don’t need fortune fame respect or speed Don’t need riches love or notoriety Just crazy desperate fear and necessity I’d almost rather see it all fall down I’d go down with it wouldn’t make a sound What’s left to say it’s all the same disgrace No amount of talking’s gonna fix this place Lay down at last the last 3-note verse That’s pretty bad believe me there is worse Yeah I’ve done worse but I’ve done better too It isn’t much but tomorrow there’ll be two
21.
Signals 02:10
Do you hear the signals Do you hear the bells Do you hear the acolytes Repeat the ancient spells Magnetic energy Is flying in the sky And burrowing down in the earth Don’t let the signals pass you by I insist there is a meaning I insist there is a plan I insist that we can trace it Back to where it all began Alchemical transformations Programmed in the sea Programming an undulating Living tapestry Listen to the distant thunder Listen to the fungus chant Listen to the cacti speaking This is no pink elephant Every ray of light is bent Around a subtle template Listen to the signals Broadcast from a subtle parapet
22.
Despair 00:56
It’s said the sickness unto Death is called despair They said it’s temporary I know because I’ve been there I would give a lot for fifteen minutes of anonymity The vectors of the possible shrink to one in the face of infinity Bad philosophy is anybody’s game But the feeling I’ve got does not have a proper name
23.
Dynamo 00:55
Power chord; structured word well afford a fifth or third Press of bodies flashing light La-di-la-dies Endless night You pay we play like a dynamo We’ve promises to keep and miles to go before we sleep and miles to go and miles to go and miles to go
24.
Isn't it all bright and shining Isn't it all sharp Isn't it all precious with the strumming of the harp Look at all the fine deceptions marvel at the sound Build the better sucker trap and watch the path they pound Watch the way they track the next fix watch them start to drool Watch the slack-jawed yokels watch this century's best power tool All wrapped up in an acid treat your Bubblegum Royale this narcissistic, solipsistic pablum puking pal
25.
Jonestown 02:02
*this song contains uncouth and profane lyrics* I dreamed I saw the Reverend Jones Alive and on the street He said I waited underground A long long time to preach this beat Waited for this bad old world To push its luck far enough down And now I’m ready to begin Fuck the world, let’s go to Jonestown Let’s go to Jonestown I dreamed I saw a flaming wheel Was spinning in the air And hovering above New York I dreamed that you and I were there And Jim Jones in a pure white suit Came riding on a pure white bull Said fuck the world, let’s go to Jonestown And celebrate the funeral
26.
Somebody told me the road to hell Is paved with good intentions and priests’ skulls Somebody told me the way to heaven Was straight and narrow and sealed with seven I’ve got good intentions and a pain in my skull I’ve got a soft spot for a parable I’ve a good idea that I’m in it thick Wish I had some clue to What it is that makes me tick
27.
Magic Bullet 01:03
Magic bullet find your mark in the chaos, in the dark just go to the place of your need only my voice you’ll heed magic bullet set me free from strife do not ask after the meaning of life just fly to the heart of my problem they do not ask and I will not tell them mark me as one who’s seen the light do not distract me from my endless night far past reason, down a hole magic bullet strike your goal
28.
Obsession 01:58
Am I obsessed with the manufacture of verse am I under a spell, a voodoo curse does it all root back to my childhood days or a summer long lost in a smoke-filled haze I confess obsession with many things God and watchworks and Saturn’s rings I’ve been recycling rhymes a long time it’s true but I’m still trying to rhyme my way back to you I’ve got a jones but that’s not what I mean I’ve gotta wash till my hands feel clean I’ve gotta sing till the words are gone so hey, today, another song Someday I’ll snap, smash through the barrier the unknown terrifies but the alternative is scarier to find at last the plenum or the void someday when my obsession is destroyed
29.
One eye clean one eye mean His eyes California grey-blue sea green Hammer in hand so much we’ll never understand this nail’s head is where the strike shall land what you could have had you’d have to call him good not bad But you are more than a stroke of the hammer of Dad Still the strike leaves its mark this is no walk in the park and the striking’s rhythm leads both to and from the dark

credits

released December 31, 2008

Original lyrics, music and performance by J M Hamlow
Additional Guitar on rewhon 'Niog T'nia Uoy by Dan Forester
Tips Dome remixes of Erewhon 'Niog T'nia Uoy and Yaw Retteb A by E.C. Zamora

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Jonathan Hamlow Minneapolis, Minnesota

Upon the rumor that he hatched from an egg laid in a dunghill and brooded by a toad the Artist vehemently denied. Upon the charge of being a semi-autonomous text generation engine, no comment was issued.

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